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PostNapisane: 2007-10-26, 21:01 
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Dołączył(a): 2007-10-26, 20:56
Posty: 4
Lokalizacja: Warsaw
Bardzo poproszę o szybką poprawę błędów. Z góry dziękuję. Tekst poniżej :)

I didn’t say anything for ages. Everybody thinking that I’m deaf-mute. Although I was very lonely, I didn’t think even, to tell them truth. But everything have been started several months ago, when I have overheard my grandmother and my mum conversation. They quarreled about my mother first son. She ditch him when he was one year baby and she don’t interesting about his life. I heard also that he living in the same town as we. So I’m not only one child ?! I was so shocked as never before. Searches of my elder brothers become my obsession. I walked everyday around my town and I looked for a person who would be similar to me.
I looked hundreds of times for my photos and photos from my youth of dad.
Certain day, after several long months of searches, when I waited in queue in bakery in order to buy bread I hear awful voice of man in wildly red jacket, who were asking for cheese-cake. Quite disgusted I have still stood in queue. My tired hands still carrying a shopping bag from another shops. Man has left from store. When I was already at cash office <olśniło mnie>. I have thrown shopping bags and I have immediately go out from bakery. I looked right side. There was only one small dog with its owner. On the left side stood group of impatient people, who waited on the green light to cross the road. I ran to their, but he wasn’t be in that group. I was very sad. I sat on the nearest paw for rest. Suddenly I saw him on the other side of the road. He kneeled on the sidewalk and he cleaned the cheese-cake from the ground. I started to ran to him. I ran as fast as I can. I ran through the group of person, street and some peoples who were around the young man in the red jacket. He was very similar to me. We have the same color of the hair and eyes. I knew that I must everything explain to him but I has not said from very a long time neither one word. I started talk. I was so excited that I wasn’t hear hue of my voice. When he heard that I have the same voice as he, he believed me. We sat long time on the desk and we told about our life . I have elder brother! I met him only due our characteristic, family voice. He would come to our house tomorrow. Curious as mum will react on that surprise …

Pozdrawiam :)

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Góra
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PostNapisane: 2007-10-27, 04:56 
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Dołączył(a): 2004-06-25, 06:02
Posty: 1843
Lokalizacja: Spokane, Washington USA
Suggested corrections, alternatives and moved words:

I didn’t say anything for ages/a long time. Everybody was thinking/Everybody thought that I’m a deaf-mute. Although I was very lonely, I didn’t think even, to tell them the truth. But everything started several months ago, when I overheard my grandmother and my mum/mom in conversation. They quarreled about my mother's first son. She ditched him/gave him up for adoption when he was a one-year old baby and she wasn’t interested about/in his life. I heard also that he is living/he lives in the same town as us/we do. So I’m not only one child?! I was so shocked as never before. Searching for my elder/older brother became my obsession. I walked everyday around my town and I looked for a person who was similar to me/who looked like me. I looked hundreds of times at my photos and photos from my youth and of my dad.

On a certain day, after several long months of searching, when I waited in a queue/line at a bakery in order to buy bread I heard the awful voice of a man in a wildly/bright red jacket, who was asking for cheese-cake. Quite disgusted was I because I still stood in the queue/line. My tired hands were still carrying a shopping bag from another shop. The man left from the store/left the store. When I was already at the cash office/cash register it struck me. I threw the shopping bags down and I immediately went out from/immediately left the bakery. I looked on the right side. There was only one small dog with its owner. On the left side stood a group of impatient people, who waited for the green light/waited for the light to turn green to cross the road. I ran to them, but he wasn’t be in that group. I was very sad. I sat on the nearest bench for a rest. Suddenly I saw him on the other side of the road. He kneeled on the sidewalk and he was cleaning the cheese-cake from the ground. I started to run to him. I ran as fast as I could. I ran through the group of people on the street and some people who were around/near the young man in the bright red jacket. He looked very similar to me. We have the same color of hair and eyes. I knew that I must explain everything to him but I did not say even one word for a very a long time. Then I started to talk. I was so excited that I didn’t hear the sound of my voice. When he heard that I have the same voice as him, he believed me. We sat for a long time on the bench and we told each other about our lives. I have an older brother! I met him only due to/because of our characteristic family voice. He will come to our house tomorrow. I am curious how mum/mom will react to that surprise.


Góra
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PostNapisane: 2007-10-27, 14:20 
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Dołączył(a): 2007-10-26, 20:56
Posty: 4
Lokalizacja: Warsaw
Thank you!

_________________
www.promowalnia.fora.pl <- tu za darmo i skutecznie wypromujesz swoją witrynę.


Góra
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